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Helen's Whoopi Goldberg Tribute

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The Color Purple

SHUG: I think it pisses God off when you walk by the color purple in a field and don't notice it.

HARPO: Who this Pa? Who this?
MISTER: The Woman that was supposed to be your mammy

CELIE: The Jail you plan for me is the one your gonna rot in

OLD MR: She black as tar, nappy headed, got legs like baseball bats, and I hear she got that nasty woman's disease.


SAM: Im Henry the 8th I am, Henry the 8th I am I am, I got married to the widow next door, she's been Married 7 times before.

SUBWAY LORD: Ahh What I wouldn't give for a Drag, Just one Drag!

MOLLY: I love you
SAM: Ditto

ODA MAE: He's stuck that's what it is, He's in between worlds, Y'know it happens sometimes that the spirit get yanked out so fast that the essence still feels it has work to do here

SAM(to Oda Mae): Would you stop rambling?

ODA MAE: I don't think Im rambling, Im just answering the Question. (to Molly) He's got an attitude now

SAM: I don't have an attitude

ODA MAE: Yes you do have an attitude. If you didn't have an attitude you would not have raised your voice at me now would ya?

SAM: God Dammit

ODA MAE: Don't you God dammit me. Don't you take the Lords name in vain with me. I don't take that.

SAM: Would you relax

ODA MAE: You relax, Your the dead guy

ODA MAE: I know you don't think Im giving this 4 million dollars to a bunch of Nuns!

SAM: I love you Molly I always have

MOLLY: Ditto

SAM: Its amazing Molly the love inside, you take it with you

ODA MAE: Why don't you go haunt a house, Rattle some chains or something

ODA MAE (to the Bank Clerk): I have a Transfusion to make.

Made in America.

ZORA: Ma it's his office
SARAH: Yes, but these are my Lungs, Let him Kill himself...Not Me


DELORES: Ive never seen anybody killed before, except for sometimes you pass on the freeway you see a couple of people dead but its not the same thing

DELORES: Im not staying in a convent these people don't even have sex

DELORES: But look at me im a Nun, Im a Penguin

REV MOTHER: from now and until you leave you are Sister Mary Clarence, Only I will know who and what you really are

DELORES (SISTER MARY CLARENCE): Bless us oh lord for those thou gifts we are about to recieve and yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of no food I will fear no hunger, We want you to give us this day our daily bread and to the republic for which it stands, I now pronunce us ready to eat.

DELORES: (On her bedroom or lack of) This is out of the Stone Age, Where's the Phone

REV MOTHER: Who would you phone?

DELORES: I dunno, Satan!